klub46

Dating at Midlife: Whats First?


More American women over 45 are single, than ever before. According to the latest population surveys, someone turns 50 every 8 seconds in the U.S. and more than half of that figure is female.

According to Christian Science Monitor writer, Marilyn Gardner, "To newly minted singles coming out of long marriages, the prospect of dating can be daunting."

At the initial phase of dating, the boomer woman may want to ask herself, "why date?" In other words, what is the objective?

In 2003, AARP conducted a study asking participants why they dated and found "the single most important...reason...is to have someone to talk to or do things with." This reason accounted for almost half of the singles in the study.

One woman from an email group didn't agree, "If these two reasons were the only reason for a woman to date it might be less complicated if she ran around with another woman instead of a man. She wouldn't have to worry about giving the guy the wrong signals. If I dated a guy it would also be because I found him sexually attractive," she said.

Other reasons from the study included: to have fun, find a partner, find someone to marry and to fulfill sexual needs.

Understanding why you want to date is an important first step in the process. This gives you a clear objective and eliminates unnecessary time spent in relationships that have nothing to do with your objective.

In addition to dating motivations, the new single should consider what type of relationship they want. Susan Dunn, EQ coach of Momentum Coaching asks, "Companionship without commitment? Is that with or without sex? Do you want long-term and sex? Is that with or without commitment? Friend with benefits? Benefits without friendship? Marriage? Is that marriage with or without fidelity?"

Once you know what you want, you can learn to ask for what you want. Don't be shy when you begin dating, the time (and heart) you save is your own.

Knowing when you're ready to date is just as important as why. Generally, experience and distance from relationships gives a person not just a needed break, but also some insight into their motivations and what they need from a relationship.

If you're going to step out again here are a few things to consider:

  • Are you mentally prepared to deal with whatever situation may arise?
  • Is your self-esteem at a high point?
  • Do you have confidence in your choices and avoid second guessing yourself?
  • If you have these three collared, you're ready to get back out there.

    Carla R. Herrera is a freelance writer and author of The Contemporary Woman's Guide to Midlife: Essays and Resources for Life Transitions. She's currently working on her next book, Contemporary Woman's Guide to Midlife Dating and publishes an online magazine for midlife women, 40+


    MORE RESOURCES:
    This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news


    NPR

    When Dating Felt Like A Job, One Woman Hired A Matchmaker
    NPR
    If there is one universal claim about dating, it's that it's tough out there. With online dating apps on mobile phones, it's easier than ever to find new people — but that takes time. Filling out dating profiles, swiping through matches and going on ...



    The Root

    Why I'm Open to Dating Bisexual Men
    The Root
    It's 2018, in the year of our lord and savior Robyn Rihanna Fenty, and people are still 7-year-olds when it comes to sexual fluidity. Error loading player: No playable sources found. A while back, while dining over fine cuisine at the Waffle House, a ...



    CNBC

    Badoo, the majority owner of the dating app Bumble, is seeking a sale that could value the company at $1.5 billion
    CNBC
    Badoo, the majority owner of the dating application Bumble, which gives women sole power to initiate conversations, is seeking a sale that could value the company at about $1.5 billion, according to people familiar with the matter. Badoo owned 79 ...

    and more »


    TIME

    Olivia Munn Personally Text Messaged Anna Faris to Dispel Chris Pratt Dating Rumors
    TIME
    Olivia Munn is shutting down rumors that she and Anna Faris are at odds because of gossip that implied that she and Faris' ex, Chris Pratt might be dating. In a series of screenshots captured by People that the actor shared on her Instagram story, Munn ...
    Olivia Munn Texts Anna Faris To Let Her Know She's Not Dating Chris PrattHuffPost
    Olivia Munn denies Chris Pratt dating rumorsCBS News
    Olivia Munn shut down Chris Pratt dating rumors by texting Anna FarisAtlanta Journal Constitution
    PEOPLE.com -Page Six -E! Online -Daily Mail
    all 111 news articles »


    The Boston Globe

    Amid Aziz Ansari accusations, singles say these are scary times to be dating
    The Boston Globe
    In this time of upheaval, with the news supplying a steady diet of new accusations of sexual misconduct, and with social media aflame with differing beliefs about the appropriate response to those accusations, those in the dating world find themselves ...

    and more »


    The Sun

    Millennials spend 10 hours a week on dating apps, research reveals
    The Sun
    "These results give one of the first insights into how long Brits spend in pursuit of love. "And it will come as no surprise that time is no barrier for most people." According to the study women were found to log on to dating apps a staggering 10 ...

    and more »


    Elite Daily

    How Dating Apps Can Affect Your Mental Health, According To Experts
    Elite Daily
    If you own a cell phone and are, you know, breathing, then chances are, you have at least one dating app on there. After all, who can resist having what's essentially an all-you-can-date buffet at your finger tips? But here's the thing: Yes, dating ...



    Dating in the closet
    ChicagoNow (blog)
    It's this terrible thought at the back of your head that just nags at you incessantly. The conversation will be going along swimmingly. He's a cute guy and seems genuinely interested. He may even seem like Mr. Right. But then I remember, and it gnaws ...



    W Magazine

    Surprise, Surprise: Scott Disick Isn't Thrilled That Kourtney Kardashian Is Dating a 24-Year-Old
    W Magazine
    ... 'What are we doing in life? What are you doing? What am I doing?'" recalled Kourtney Kardsahian on Sunday night's episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. "And I'll go, 'What are you doing?' And he'll say, 'But what are you doing?'" Of course ...

    and more »


    NBC 7 San Diego

    Criminals Using Photos of Dead Service Members to Con Victims on Dating Sites
    NBC 7 San Diego
    Developers of a new dating app are warning customers about the prevalence of criminals fraudulently using pictures of dead and active duty service members on various sites to con victims and steal their money. “They want to present themselves as heroes ...

    and more »

    Google News

    home | Clicky Web Analytics Clicky
    © 2006